Funny-Christmas.com

Humor for the holidays

Entries for the ‘Funny Christmas Poems’ Category

Santa’s Twin by Dean Koontz

What would happen if Santa Claus had an evil twin who decided to kidnap his brother on Christmas Eve and bring items such as mud pies and cat poop to children all over the world rather than the toys and presents they were expecting? In Dean Koontz’s world, the imposter would quickly be foiled by [...]

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Redneck Christmas Encounter: A Funny Christmas Poem

a poem by Debora Dyess
As I watched the cartoon with the Grinch and Max
I felt every one of my muscles go lax.
Sitting on the couch on Christmas Eve
After I’d asked all our house guests to leave.
Drifting in and out of my dreams,
Thinking on Christmas hopes and schemes
I started as I heard a super loud boom
Come [...]

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Funny 12 Days of Christmas Videos

Who needs a partridge in a pear tree or eight maids a milking anyway? These funny 12 Days of Christmas videos follow the familiar tune, but replace the classic lyrics with some new, funny verses. Lyrics are included for the “12 Pains of Christmas” and the “12 Days After Christmas.” Listen closely to the others!

12 [...]

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Snowman Poop Poem Variations

Snowman Poop Poem #1
This is the snowman poop poem that seems to be most common on the web. It’s short, funny, and lets the recipient know that this gift is because they’ve been naughty.
I hear that you’ve been naughty.
So listen, here’s the scoop.
Instead of getting coal this year,
You’re getting snowman poop!
Snowman Poop Poem [...]

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Twas the Month After Christmas Poem

Here’s a funny Chrismas poem for everyone who struggles with weight gain during the holidays.
Twas the Month After Christmas
‘Twas the month after Christmas, and all through the house
Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.
The cookies I’d nibbled, the eggnog I’d taste
At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.
When I got on the [...]

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A Politically Correct Christmas Poem

A parody of “The Night Before Christmas”
‘Twas the night before Christmas and Santa’s a wreck…
How to live in a world that’s politically correct?
His workers no longer would answer to “Elves,”
“Vertically Challenged” they were calling themselves.
And labor conditions at the North Pole
Were alleged by the union to stifle the soul.
Four reindeer had vanished, without much propriety,
Released [...]

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